大学英语作文1600字：A Pregnant Woman in the sun
she had nearly dozed away the whole lazy afternoon, with her eyelash loose down and some naughty hairs playing and rejoicing on her forehead.
occasionally, she would knit her brows out of a surge of pain. but when relief came she would smile again and relish once more the enchanting curve of her abdomen, feeling the fresh pulse of the child inside.
the afternoon went by quietly, of which the highlight might be butterfly that kept pestering her. now it had alighted on her chair, wings shining in the setting sun, triggering her childlike fantasy. her finger could not help but snail its way toward the little creature. nearer and nearer, until the butterfly was finally between her delicate fingers. after a while, she decided to release it. no sooner had she slightly opened her fingers than the little creature sprang right up into the air, as vigorous, she thought, as her future child would be.
so, always, true vitality resides in tranquility, as real beauty in love.
简 评
本文细致入微地描写了一位孕妇在午后的阳光下休憩的情景。文章一开始即描写了孕妇小睡时的悠闲神态：睫毛低垂着，几根发丝在额前拂动。作者随后描写了孕妇在时时感受到肉体上痛苦的同时，心中充满了对腹中婴儿的母爱。第三段中，作者叙述了一个小插曲：一只蝴蝶扰乱了孕妇的休息，但她不忍杀生，仍将蝴蝶放飞了。作者还有一句对孕妇心理状态的描写：蝴蝶矫健的动作使她联想到她未来的孩子也会像那只蝴蝶一样健壮。
文章篇幅虽短，但对孕妇的描写非常到位，有外表、神态、动作和心理状态的描写，勾勒出了一位充满爱心的准妈妈的形象，非常鲜明饱满。
文章的最后一段点明主题：真正的美在于爱这份高尚的情感中。
此外，值得一提的是文章的用词非常优美而准确，如some naughty hairs playing and rejolcmg on her forehead；knit her brows out of a surge of para；the enchanting curve of her abdomen等。在描写抓蝴蝶的动作时her finger could not help but snail its way toward the little creature．nearer and nearer，until the butterfly was finally between her delicate fingers．无不充满了生活的情趣。
(点评教师：黄莺)